It’s funny, because when I was just typing the title line in, I slipped and wrote “Letting God” instead of “Letting Go”. Letting God would definitely be an appropriate title too.
Working Spirit- it is tough for me at times to find the appropriate balance between a faith that follows me everywhere and knowing that my spirituality can only go so far while I am at work.
April is a time of stress for our unit. We are all trying to figure out our budgets for next year- always a sensitive thing. We are hoping we have enough to get by on, and that we have whatever means we need to get us through the summer. We also are spending a lot of time looking to the fall and planning for a new year. Fall is a good time to implement changes and the summer is a good time to do whatever is needed to set ourselves up for successful transitions into change. This means that in April we are thinking about what we want to improve upon and what it will take to get us there. We readily see what we DON’T have, what we DON’T do well. It means that in April we try to figure out how to do what feels like the impossible. In April, we double our work load, doing what we do on a regular day to day basis and create something entirely new for the next academic year. All in all, we’re usually pretty stressed out, and so are our students.
With stress comes frustrations. We’re quick to jump the gun, quick to place blame and real quick to simply say, I’ll do it [because I want it done my way]. Or ‘who are you to decided…’ or to ‘question’ and the list goes on.
Regardless of how great we usually are at letting thngs go, not letting the past or little things bother us, in April this is harder to do.
April also brings a time of fasting, a time or remembering sacrifice. And, for some, this too puts us a little more on edge.
But April also brings my favorite time of year and it is tied for what, to me, is the most important holiday of the year: April brings Easter.
Now I’m tired and I’m crabby, I’ve got the flu that is going around which is completely new to me (this is the second time I’ve had a fever- EVER. The last time was when I had H1N1 which was then complicated because of my sever asthma) and well, it’s just made April not too fun so far. I forgot it was Psalm Sunday this last weekend until I walked in and was handed a psalm… I keep forgetting Easter is this weekend. I need to let go of everything that I am letting pull me away from the core of who I am.
I talk with students on a daily basis about how advertising and media does a really really good job of manipulating us. And yet I’m still wrapped up in it myself. When I am at a point in my life where I can’t get work off my mind, I only find myself praying a few times a day and I am not spending this time to reflect upon what Jesus was experiencing years ago, then truely, utterly, I need to let go.
My life on earth really does not matter at all if I do not have a close relationship with God. Part of that, for me, means living my life as closely as I can to how Jesus lived his life. He is a man who knew how to let go. I cannot help but think about the fact that while he was being murdered in the most grusem way our world at the time knew, he could have called out for help to God and instatly been saved…. And yet he didn’t. The man walked on water. He had so much power that even his CLOTHS heald a woman when she simple touched them. We’re talking more power than we even have the capability of fully understanding as we live our lives here on earth. And yet, he knew that if he simply let go, allowed himself to be murdered and waited until it was over, that he would be with the most powerful being there is. His sorrow, his missory, his pain, every eathly thing we experience (from suicide ideation to a stubbed toe) would be no more. But he didn’t ‘let it go’ to be with God. He had God with him all the time- he and God were and still are one and the same. There was no need for him to die and go to heaven because he was already more powerful than what we experience here on earth. He did it for us. You. Me. Your mom. Your enimy. All of us. He let go because it what was best for the world. He wanted us to have a world where our sins were forgiven (do you realize that sins were never forgiven before Jesus was born on earth?). Jesus did not have to come to this world. But God wanted him to. He was a gift for us. There is nothing more important to me than this gift that I was given.
So, so what if that person drove me nuts again today? So what that I have this silly flu? So what that I can’t make the trip back home to celebrate Easter? So what to all of life?… I need to let go of the things that are of this world and remember that something far greater, far more powerful gave up, let go of everything, just for me and you.